Sometimes people find their ways into unhealthy relationships. This is the story of a damaging relationship that resulted in a disturbing string of unhinged videos.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bVSZK_VtAY
Melissa: I cheated on Eisel....
Eisel: You were so cruel and so vicious....
Melissa: And I got caught....
Eisel: I just don’t get it. How do you live with yourself? ...
Melissa: I was trying to cheat on him....
Eisel: You never showed me the messages. You never admitted what happened....
Melissa: It was two different guys at the same time....
Eisel: I will never live this down. These were complex lies.
Whether you find what I just showed you shocking, amusing, or funny, I’m sure you’re definitely confused.
On this platform, we’ve seen many people share deeply personal aspects of their lives with the public.
This often includes the ugly moments.
The moment we’re witnessing here is one of the many moments that resulted from the mental breakdown that was the result of a clearly not-so-great relationship.
So let’s take a look at exactly how we got to this moment.
Eisel: Why am I not a Buddhist?
You have likely never heard of this channel before, but it’s been around for a long time now.
a-bas-le-ciel was started by a man named Eisel a decade ago, and the progression we see from the beginning to this point is fascinating.
Eisel’s first videos were mainly centered around him talking about Buddhism as an ex-Buddhist, as well as general religion and philosophy.
Eisel: One of the biggest Shadows hanging over modern Buddhism is the idea that what is more ancient is more rational.
Although he was born in Canada, it is clear that he has a great interest in language, which has brought him to many parts of the world, including Cambodia, Laos, Thailand, and China.
Needless to say, he lived a rather unique life.
But like the main character of every story, he was hit with a significant tragedy that had a large impact on his life.
On April 3rd, 2014, he uploaded a video titled Goodbye, My Daughter.
Eisel: My reason for creating this YouTube channel is that I have a daughter and I have a daughter that I will never get to see again.
Don’t worry, she’s not dead.
The way he opens this really makes it seem like she is, but no.
This is tragic, but not that tragic.
In the video, he talks about how 10 months after his daughter was born, his wife left him, taking the daughter and most of their money.
He speaks a lot about the struggle he is going through, and although he doesn’t portray his ex-wife in the best light, given the situation, he does seem to be genuinely empathetic toward her, which isn’t something that I expected.
Eisel: As terrible as it is for me, I sympathize that she’s made a very tough decision and chosen a very hard path in choosing to be a single mother and I’m left to say that in some sense, I support her decision, even if it has a devastating effect on my own life.
Ultimately, he says that he’s making videos on this channel in hopes that one day, his daughter sees them so she can get to know about him and the type of person that he was.
Eisel: I’m creating these videos with the hope that one day, My daughter will have the opportunity to see them.
One day this will create an opportunity for her to know what I sounded like, what I looked like, what motivated me in life, what the reasons were for how I lived my life up to this point.
To put it lightly, this statement aged very poorly.
Izul continues posting his regular content, eventually expanding into becoming an advocate for veganism.
He tried to be pretty involved in the vegan community, making video responses to some well-known members of the community during that time period, like Freely, Durian Ryder, and The Goats, Vegan Gains.
During his journey, he moved to China in order to learn Chinese.
While here, he uploaded a video called Yes, I Love My Daughter, where he explained that he was learning Chinese in part for his daughter, since his ex-wife and him were very curious about their daughter learning Chinese as a second language.
In this video, we also learn a bit more about the ongoing legal battle going on between him and his ex-wife.
Eisel: We filed for divorce, but the paperwork and the actual trial and so on, the court proceedings are still unfinished.
The frustration is clearly getting to him as he becomes more vocal about the ways in which his ex-wife is purposefully making this difficult for him.
Eisel: She basically stabbed me in the back.
In order for her to prevent me from seeing my daughter, all she has to do is not respond to an e-mail and she’s done that many times.
Eisel was clearly going through a tough time, but to his credit, he seemed to be taking it fairly well.
Suddenly, things started to look up for him when he introduced us to his new girlfriend, Melissa, in a video on June 1st, 2017.
Eisel: We are two people who both talk about the future, talk about our educational prospects and our job options.
This would be our first look at her, and no one expected that seven years later, it would end up like this.
Eisel: What happened? No, you are not going to tell your life story, starting with your ex-boyfriend you were with before me or how you lost your virginity. No. What happened?
Eisel and Melissa met under unique circumstances.
She was a fan of his videos, and one day, she sent him an e-mail asking about the rap music that was used in some of his videos.
This led to them talking, and very quickly, Melissa made the hasty decision to move all the way to China to be with him.
As both of them mentioned, this was much of the displeasure of Melissa’s parents.
Eisel: Like, okay, I’ll say this.
I think back when you were selling this to your parents.
When you were explaining to your parents, because your parents were just freaked out by you moving to China, period.
Melissa: Yeah.
Eisel: I mean, they were slightly freaked out by me in particular.
To add to this unconventional situation, there was also a significant age gap, with Melissa being 24 years old and Eisel being 38 years old at this time, which was a controversial point for some people.
Melissa’s decision seemed rash, and at least from my perspective, there seemed to be points in which the gravity of this weighed on her a bit.
In one of their videos, Melissa talks about this feeling of being in limbo.
You have to keep in mind, Melissa just moved from the United States to China to be with what is basically a stranger she met online.
I can see why that might feel isolating.
You’re separated from everyone you once knew in an unfamiliar area, and you can’t communicate with anyone since you don’t speak their language.
The only person she could really interact with was Eisel.
She was totally reliant on him.
Melissa: Yeah, and this is a time that a lot of people that I talk to, they say it’ll be a great experience for me.
Yeah.
But it’s also a little bit strange feeling like you’re in limbo, feeling like this is not really going anywhere, even though it is a good experience, even though I’m happy.
Eisel: What is it you think you’re cut off from? Like for six months in China.
Melissa: The Western world, speaking English, an actual community.
Like I am, I hope that we do move to Canada.
I think that’s generally the plan.
It seemed like Eisel and her weren’t totally on the same level here.
Eisel: Well, look, see, what’s interesting is just before she said that, she started talking about Canada, I was thinking the exact opposite.
Nonetheless, the relationship between them grew to be incredibly strong, and Melissa started appearing in almost every one of Eisel’s videos for a long period of time.
Eisel even took her along with him when he went to visit his daughter, and Melissa seemed to genuinely care for her and become a big part of her life.
Regardless of how this all may have initially seemed to their audience, I will say that Eisel and Melissa do seem to genuinely be in love with each other.
I can’t deny that.
Melissa’s potential life opportunities started to open up when, in December of 2017, her and Eisel did end up leaving China to return to the Western world.
They had been together for about six months at this point.
As their relationship progressed, the number of critical comments from viewers increased.
As opposed to just ignoring these comments and continuing to live their life how they once, they put a decent bit of effort into responding to their criticism.
On December 21st, 2018, they uploaded a video specifically talking about their age gap and Now some people found it weird.
At this point, Melissa was 26 years old and Eisel was 40 years old.
An interesting comment that Eisel made was about how he did not see Melissa as intellectually equal to him.
Eisel: They are really uncomfortable with us admitting and talking about, in an honest and down-to-earth way, the intellectual inequality between us.
Melissa: Yeah.
Eisel: If you have two people of equal intelligence and a 14-year age gap, The older person is going to be vastly, vastly superior to the younger person.
Melissa: Yeah.
And to be fair, Melissa clearly has no issue with this.
Melissa: I don’t see it as a negative thing at all.
Eisel: Yeah.
Melissa: I see it only as a positive thing that you can be in this role of teaching me things, I mean.
This is also when we get an interesting insight into Melissa’s behavior.
They both share an experience where Melissa had a meltdown over a relatively trivial incident.
Eisel: When we first got together within the first couple of months, you once really threw a tantrum over the dryer, the clothes washing machine, the clothes dryer, that the dryer had damaged one of your t-shirts.
She was furious, she was livid, she was freaking out over this t-shirt.
‘Cause if you had known me when I was 23, where you were screaming at me, where I would’ve screamed back at you.
This might seem like something that isn’t too big of a deal, especially if it was just a one-off incident, but as you’ll see, this is going to be a recurring theme.
Around the same time, Izo uploaded a video titled, On Almost Breaking Up with My Girlfriend.
This was one of the first videos I watched on this channel where the whole time I was thinking, this is really, really weird.
Let’s have a look.
Eisel: Okay, the concept for this video, if not the title, is why have I not broken up with Melissa, my girlfriend who’s sitting right off camera here, all right?
So already he’s speaking about this topic that I don’t think anyone even asked him about in the first place and also, he’s sitting here speaking about Melissa in this context while she’s in the same room as him and she’s not in frame like she typically is for his other videos, which makes me think that she’s probably not all that comfortable with this.
Eisel: Here’s what it is.
The main redeeming quality Melissa has is that I never have the same fight twice with her.
Sounds good, I guess, but the vibe continued to get weirder when he said this.
Eisel: It’s got to be learning from experience.
Can I apply this to myself? I mean, most of the problems that we should have from Melissa’s side.
He continues to tell a story about how recently Melissa hacked his Facebook account to read his messages out of some sort of jealous rage.
Apparently all she found were just messages saying positive things about her.
Eisel: For me, that’s 100% grounds to break up with you.
Now, don’t get me wrong here.
I think hacking into your partner’s social media to read their messages is psychotic.
I’m not disputing that.
What I think is weird is that Eisel is having this conversation and posting it to his audience on YouTube.
There’s obviously some problems in their relationship, and it’s completely inappropriate to just air out all the shitty things each other do on social media.
These kinds of things should be reserved for private conversations.
This video almost feels like some kind of punishment for Melissa.
About six months later, Eisel posted a similar video called Breaking Up With My Girlfriend repeatedly.
Melissa: It’s the insecurity of you leaving me and me never finding somebody that I love as much as you.
Eisel: I had a situation with Melissa a couple of months ago and she really hurt me.
You know, I was trembling for I think 3 hours.
Over the course of more than two years, this relationship has really damaged me.
It has really broken me down.
It seems this relationship has been taking a serious toll on his mental health.
With how many problems Melissa seems to cause for Eisel, you might be wondering why he doesn’t just break up with her.
The answer is, he’s tried, I guess.
Eisel: My experience of this relationship has been Melissa crossing the line, me dumping her, and then Melissa begging her way back into the relationship.
Once again, I don’t think it is healthy at all to be sharing these deeply personal aspects of your relationship online like this, especially when it literally seems to have no purpose other than to villainize one side of it.
Now, at this point, while this is all very weird, I do feel for them both.
If this was the extent of everything, then I wouldn’t even be making a video about this at all.
But oh my god, it gets deeper.
As the uploads on this channel persisted, audience members continued posting comments voicing their concerns for Melissa.
Eventually, in February of 2020, Eisel ended up disabling comments on all of his videos.
He made a video talking about why he disabled them, giving us some spiel about how he did it for our benefit because he wanted to spend time commenting on YouTube or something like that, but that just seems like bullshit to me.
Despite this small adjustment, the uploads did not slow down.
In fact, Melissa started developing a stronger presence of her own.
The channel began uploading videos that exclusively featured Melissa, where we could really see her full personality shine.
Despite comments being disabled, Eisel and Melissa were still fully aware of their critical views being held by their audience.
At one point, Melissa took it upon herself to address these criticisms, and a clickbait video titled girlfriend dumped me because of you, Melissa talks about comments from people saying things like, Melissa is a manipulated hostage, and, I’m very worried for Melissa.
But Melissa stays very consistent.
She defends her relationship with Eisel and maintains that she’s very happy and deeply in love with him.
For the record, I think this is true.
Even to this day, I think Melissa is genuinely in love with Eisel.
But that doesn’t justify what we’re about to witness.
On April 14th, 2024, things officially went from weird to full-on psychotic.
Eisel uploaded a video titled, My Girlfriend Cheated on Me: Years of Lies and Broken Promises.
Melissa: Hello.
I’m going to read an e-mail that I sent to people I really care about in January.
Okay, so first of all, what the hell is this? This is already creepy as hell with the eerie shot of Melissa and Eisel’s heavy breathing in the background.
It reminds me of that one scene in Batman.
Joker: Tell them your name.
So it starts off with Melissa reading an e-mail that Eisel made her send to her friends and family.
Melissa: I cheated on Eisel and I got caught.
I was trying to cheat on him with two different guys at the same time.
One guy is a big black guy.
I’m not entirely sure why this detail is relevant, but I think we already knew that Eisel was kind of a weirdo.
Eisel chimes in at time to say certain things, and it was almost comical when he said this.
Eisel: You didn’t even watch, I mean, you stopped watching my YouTube videos, let alone respond to them or have you?
Like, seriously? And this isn’t the first time he brings that up, he does it again.
Eisel: It’s a really strange sign of infidelity, but it’s very telling when you stop watching your boyfriend’s videos or stop watching your husband’s videos.
If any of you watching this are content creators, I’m sure you’ll agree with me that, unless you’re a psycho, you do not care if your partner doesn’t watch or enjoy your videos.
It’s not a big deal.
In fact, this should be doubly so for Eisel, because if I’m being completely honest, most of his videos are insanely boring.
They’re super long, low-effort videos of him just ranting about pointless stuff and he posts a lot.
He has over 2.6 thousand videos.
I’d be shocked if Melissa did watch every one of them and here’s the real kicker.
It obviously makes sense to be upset with your partner for cheating on you, but they were in an open relationship.
Melissa: You may wonder how it’s possible to cheat on your boyfriend when you’re in an open relationship.
Eisel: A polyamorous relationship.
Melissa: Yeah. Just not being open and not being honest means that you’re cheating.
I’m not saying this totally dismisses Melissa from any wrongdoing.
Clearly, there was some sort of agreement they had that they would keep each other in the loop with the people they were seeing, and Melissa obviously violated this.
But dude, this is such a bizarre overreaction.
The rest of the video features Eisel berating Melissa while she expresses extreme remorse for her actions.
In the next video Eisel uploaded, he starts off by asking Melissa personal questions that seem to have no purpose other than to shame her.
Eisel: Let me ask you something, Melissa.
How many orgasms do you think you’ve had today?
The reason for the second video is because Eisel just discovered some more details that Melissa was hiding in the first video.
He initially thought she was just planning on meeting with other guys, but apparently a little more than that happened.
Eisel: You masturbated on camera for another man. No evasion, no going back, no justification...
Melissa: (to the camera) I’m not making justifications--
Eisel: ...What happened!?
Eisel’s insecurities start to come out in full force with some of the comments he makes.
Eisel: Okay, there is, I’m sure the audience will remember there was the large black guy who was a bodybuilder.
You’ve added that off camera that he’s not that large.
That’s topic for another video, for this dude.
Melissa: Yes.
Eisel: Who is smaller than me, uglier than me?
Melissa: Yes.
Eisel: He actually has a physical disability.
Melissa: (nods)
Eisel: He has a malformed penis, you were telling me.
Melissa: Yes.
Eisel: Please describe his penis for the audience.
Like, I hate to laugh at this, but come on.
It’s just, it’s so absurd and near the end of the video, Eisel starts lashing out at Melissa, saying a bunch of things to make her feel bad.
Eisel: You’ve ruined my life for seven years.
You’ve ruined my life as an author.
You’ve ruined what I can do in terms of education, in terms of career.
I sacrificed everything for you.
You’ve ruined my YouTube channel.
None of these things are true, by the way.
Eisel’s completely delusional.
Melissa literally left the United States to come to him in China, and he’s saying that he made sacrifices.
But I think one of the worst things Eisel said was this.
Eisel: When you think of the most beautiful women who tried to sleep with me, and how you ruined that for me, I knew a woman who was beautiful.
She was a white woman who taught herself Chinese and ancient Latin and Greek.
She was beautiful and brilliant.
I thought this comment was absolutely evil.
It might not seem like much at first glance, but remember in a previous video where Melissa was crying about one of her insecurities, being that I will meet a woman that is smarter and knows a bunch of languages like him.
Melissa: You know, you’re basically on the cusp of leaving me.
So like, if somebody more beautiful, more studies Chinese, like, has been to Laos, has been to, you know, China, Yeah, hell yeah.
You’re gonna jump off and get on somebody else’s ship.
This comment is very clearly an attempt to weaponize that insecurity.
It’s still not over yet.
In Eisel’s next video, Abusive Girlfriend, when the woman sexually traumatizes the man, Eisel forces Melissa to talk about one of the times in which she was abusive toward him.
Eisel: This is a relationship in which the female partner abuses the male, that that is the problem, not vice versa.
Melissa: I have said and done just terrible things that have denigrated Eisel sexually and traumatized him sexually.
I feel like Eisel’s probably feeling some sense of frustration since for years he’s been accused of being an abuser while he clearly sees himself as more of a victim.
So this video seems to be a way to show everyone that he is the victim.
Ironically, in doing this, he only makes himself appear 10 times worse than he did before.
In Eisel’s next video, he continues to exhibit thriller movie levels of psycho behavior when he records Melissa leaving this voice message to one of the guys she had an affair with.
Melissa: It has ruined my life, and it ruined my relationship with the man of my dreams, the love of my life. My life is over. I really think my only option is killing myself. My only option is dead.
The fact that I sent you nude photos and videos of myself without telling ISIL is the worst thing I have done in my life. I was a good person before I knew you.
My affair with you ruined my life. I ruined my own life for you.
Answering machine: Your recording has reached the maximum length. To replay your message, press five.
The last video Eisel uploaded on this day was called “Cheating Girlfriend Apologizes, Asked me to take her back, give her another chance.”
Melissa: Eisel (cries). Okay, Eisel. Do you feel at one stage of the relationship that I love you?
This follows the same theme as before, with Eisel going off about how she ruined everything.
Eisel: You’ve really ruined my life and you have done it in a way that is permanently devastating to my career and reputation.
Think I’m gonna be a lawyer now, Melissa? What do you think I’m gonna do with the rest of my life? Think I’m gonna work with the stock market? What do you think about my bright future? How about as an author? How about as a leader in the vegan movement?
To be honest, I have no idea what the hell Eisel’s talking about here.
Being a lawyer, working the stock market, he wasn’t planning on doing these things in the 1st place and some girl cheating on you doesn’t affect anything.
What’s he talking about? Plenty of people have been cheated on before.
I think the logic is that he finds it so humiliating that it ruined his reputation or something like that. But the thing is... He did this to himself.
He’s the one posting these psychotic videos airing all this shit out. He talks about his reputation. What reputation? Hardly anyone even watches his videos.
The only reason I even know about this is because of these strings of absolutely deranged videos he’s posted. If it weren’t for this, I wouldn’t even know who this guy is.
It’s like that meme with the kid holding the boot up to his head. It’s so dramatic.
As of finishing up the script, these weird hostage-style videos have stopped, and the rest have been near-daily uploads from Melissa talking about weird topics that obviously seem to be influenced by Eisel to make her look bad.
I don’t know what the future holds for Melissa and Eisel, but unfortunately, they’re probably going to stay together through this somehow.
Now, I want to make a few things clear here. In my opinion, what Eisel is doing here definitely qualifies as psychological abuse. With that in mind, I don’t think Melissa is all rainbows and sunshine either.
From the anecdotal things I’ve heard through all these videos, she does seem to be, at the very least, an incredibly difficult person to deal with, and at the most, capable of insane emotional damage. That said, what Eisel is doing here is clearly much worse.
I think the most depressing part about this is that a decade ago, Eisel didn’t seem to be this kind of person. He was going through a difficult time in his life when his wife left him and took his kid, but he seemed so optimistic and hopeful.
In one of his first videos, he talked about this channel being a sort of legacy he could leave behind for his daughter. After everything we’ve just seen, I feel sorry for his daughter. Her father has exhibited some truly disgraceful behavior that she absolutely should not look up to.
Eizel, I don’t know if you’re watching this or not, but there’s a good chance you might, since personally I think you might be a narcissist. So if you are watching this, you need to get help, dude. This is not normal. I think both you and Melissa are mentally ill, and only a professional is capable of unwrapping whatever the hell all of this is. But knowing what I know about you, self-awareness is the last thing I would expect.
Thank you for watching, and I will see you on the flip side.
Arachobia: “I wish my daughter would one day see these videos to see what kind of a person I was.” A finger on the Monkey’s Paw curls.
connorbowen8867: Sometimes two very damaged people find each other, and it’s terrible.
Scorpio of Autumn: I’ll take “Men Who Should NOT Be Raising Daughters” for $800, Alex.
DjDeadpig: Genuinely hate how public breakdowns being recorded and posted online has become the norm. I still remember the Elissa Jordana one that happened recently.
DrMechano: If my girlfriend cheated on me, I’d just break up with her and move on, not psychologically torture her for months over it. At a certain point, you should walk away from a relationship that clearly isn’t working, not turn it into an abusive situation that’s clearly making you both miserable.
russellst.martin4255: You think I’m gonna be an astronaut quarterback NOW Melissa
salemish: I would not be surprised if Melissa disappeared or turned up dead. She’s young and has plenty of time to grow and become a better person. But Eisel seems to be stuck in his ways and so much worse. The best thing for both of them is to break up and never speak to each other again.
jamesthomas6681: this is a classic codepenent relationship... they both most likely will need years of therapy on their own to break their maladaptive behaviors and thought patterns
philtkaswahl2124: Jesus, this has so many red flags I can almost hear the Soviet anthem.
Shaushkaa: I had a relation like this. He wanted I “confess” things and brainwashed me into thinking I was crazy and malevolent.
The forced confession is a CLASSIC in abusive relationship.
Lion08888: He lives in Newfoundland now. I’ve met him once, didn’t know who he was at the time, and he seemed completely normal. He comes frequently to comedy shows and tries to run in the same circles as the comedians. Only a few know about his videos with Melissa. I think he came here to try to escape this image but I really hope it catches up to him. As for Melissa, she lives elsewhere, but is still with him and sometimes visits (I’ve never seen her but people in the scene have mentioned seeing her at a few comedy shows).
jmenchions: This is insane. This guy has been showing up in my local comedy scene. He has been at my weekly shows and I’ve talked to him. He always wears a track suit. Recently he claimed to be a talent agent so some local comedians did some digging and found this video. Fucking wild dude
crossroads2361: Here’s a sad update: they are still together after seemingly haven broken up for a period. And his delusionally narcissistic content has only ramped up. He even made a video about Melissa’s contemplations with suicide like it was some fascinating experience.
b00biel0ver8: Oh he is abusing her badddd. That’s severe emotional abuse, he’s using public humiliation to control her
runnkorad: Someone call the cops on him
This is not the Disney Channel: this is my life. @ScareTheater
An autobiographical reply to “ScareTheater”, a channel with over one million subscribers that put together a hit video about the two of us titled, “Public Breakdown: When Your Partner Goes Too Far.” The link to that video is here: • Public Breakdown: When Your Partner Goes T...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPoUyYT98nM
Eisel: Hi. If you’ve never met me before, this is not CNN, this is not HBO, this is not the BBC, and this is definitely not the Disney Channel. This is my life.
This YouTube channel now is and always has been about the reality of my life. Now, Melissa has been a huge part of my life. So to some extent, it’s about our life together and it’s about her life. And it always has been.
Melissa is the woman I want to be with when I’m 65 years old. So I can’t quite say it always will be, because when I’m 66, we’re going to split up and I’ll be single. But for the foreseeable future, okay? It always will be.
There is a certain segment of public opinion that wants everything on YouTube to be the same as an episode of a soap opera on the Disney Channel.
All right? Some of you don’t want to see real emotions, real struggles, whether that’s my struggle with unemployment, my struggle with university education, or the struggles we’ve gone through as a couple.
All right? I realized today I’m going to get a whole lot of new viewers who’ve never heard of me before coming over from this hit video on Scare Theater, a channel that has 1 million subscribers.
Let me ask you, know, what does it mean to be strong? When you see Melissa making the choice, and it’s her choice, to step forward on camera and talk about her view of this from her perspective.
Sometimes weeping, sometimes in a self-comfort way, sometimes joking.
We’ve already made comedy videos. Again, he doesn’t show this in his documentary. He put a lot of effort into it, but... If you just look at the front page of my YouTube channel right now, you’re going to see a whole variety of perspectives here, including both of us singing songs about this together and laughing about it, right? Like, we can have a laugh at our own expense, you know? Talk about you don’t know whether to laugh or cry, okay? We have done both.
When you look at what Melissa is doing on camera, do you see weakness? Or do you see strength? Because what I hear from these people in the audience, the people who wish that my channel were the same as the Disney Channel, who wish that planet Earth were planet Disney, who wish that they didn’t have to deal with reality, that they could only deal with fiction.
All of you look at what Melissa is doing and say, you could never do that yourself.
Therefore, it’s not normal.
Therefore, both of us should be put in a lunatic asylum.
That’s what you’re really saying.
The fact that you could never do what Melissa has done, that’s not because of her weakness.
That’s because of her strength.
She has a kind of strength you don’t have to live this way and deal with the consequences and put it on the internet.
Okay? I’ll give you an example.
Melissa, I know when you first made YouTube videos talking about ancient Greece and Rome, Aristotle, Socrates, Plato, major philosophers of the past, she felt so embarrassed and ashamed of those videos and she wished she could go back and delete them.
I think just one year later, you’d kind of grown so much.
You knew you could do a better video on the same topic today, right? That’s hard too.
Like even doing book reviews takes a kind of strength that no offense, most of you in the audience don’t have.
The line of reasoning I’m asking you to watch out for, to be a little bit self-critical for you guys in the audience is this.
Anyone who does not do what, quote, a normal person would do, anyone who does not do what the average person would do, Anyone who does not struggle to misrepresent and lie about their own lives to make it look like Disney Channel fiction is therefore insane or is therefore abusive and quote unquote should get professional help or should be put in a mental hospital.
All right.
So like, I’m just being honest with you.
This is like Islam.
like either you submit to the religion of Islam, or you are a heretic, or you are an enemy of the belief system, and you can’t be tolerated.
Well, yeah, we are the enemies of planet Disney.
This is the antithesis to and the antidote to the Disney Channel.
Our relationship has been fantastically romantic, fantastically passionate.
If you guys have just come here from this video, so what’s his name, scare monger, scare theater, you know, you heard this one snippet where I’m asking her, how many orgasms did you have today? Now, the reason why I say that, if you go watch the whole video, is because she was cheating on me in this way during a period of time when the sex and the relationship was really amazing.
She was routinely having more than 100 orgasms A day.
So you quote that out of context, you claim I’m a psychopath, you claim it’s true.
You know, I’ve met women who never had a single orgasm in their whole lives.
I’ve known marriages that are utterly loveless and utterly sexless in this way.
We are a couple.
We’re tremendously passionate about the same things in terms of politics, in terms of history, in terms of ecology, in terms of YouTube, in terms of filmmaking, in terms of comedy.
We’re passionate about the same things, but we’re also incredibly passionate about each other.
All right.
Back when she was cheating on me, which is four years ago, she hid it from me for about four years.
The sex was amazing.
And that has to be part of the story.
I’m not getting engaged in a critique of this kind of thing, but he is criticizing me saying I have insecurities about penis size.
I’m like, no, watch the videos.
Just search the channel for 100 orgasms.
Search the channel for the live stream I did on Valentine’s Day about polyamory and the open relationship. “Inmon versus incel”, whatever it’s called. You get to see me laughing and joking. You get to see us having a lot of fun together.
You know, no, this is a relationship with tremendous sexual chemistry. Always has been. Tremendous passion, tremendous positivity.
But also, but also, this is the part you don’t see on the Disney Channel. Also, you know, tremendous suffering. Okay.
At one point he criticized me. He says it’s psychotic or he says it’s insane. That I say, I made sacrifices for this relationship. His one piece of evidence for this is that she moved to China to be with me for six months.
Therefore, she’s the one who made sacrifices I didn’t make.
Woo, well, it’s been seven years.
No, I have made sacrifices.
And again, this is not in the Walt Disney version of reality or even the HBO version of reality.
Even A so-called gritty drama on a channel like HBO, you see people fall in love.
You see the seduction phase of the relationship.
You see the person swept off their feet.
You know, you don’t ever see two eccentric intellectuals who love each other, who care about each other so much, you know, who, again, are passionate about achieving the same things in the world long term, but who nevertheless make each other’s lives miserable.
for example, with dishonesty and cheating.
That’s never going to be on CNN.
It’s never going to be on HBO.
So guys, you know, in this sense, I’m asking you to positively appreciate what it is we have to share.
All right? If my life is a tragedy, I’m sharing it with you, and you can learn something from that.
You can’t learn anything by mocking it or dismissing it or making up conspiracy theories, like pretending that she’s only saying these things in these videos because I’m forcing her to.
Just watch more of the videos.
You’ll figure it out.
The videos, the videos really do speak for themselves.
If you only watch 30 seconds or someone clipping something, go, yeah.
What, You want to say?
Melissa: No, I just...
Of course it takes...
It takes amount.
Oh gosh, I can’t even speak right now.
I really wanted Izal to make a statement.
So I, yeah, I’m sorry.
Eisel: No edits.
If I edit, what are people going to make up about me? Abortions edit.
But yeah, it’s about midnight here.
It’s been a long day.
Melissa: It’s been a really long day.
It’s been a really long, yeah, it’s been a really long few weeks.
So yeah, but yeah, I made this choice.
It’s A conscious choice.
And you can learn from my mistakes.
I think part of learning from your mistakes is actually going back and being honest with yourself and being honest with other people about your mistakes.
And this was a massive mistake.
I’ve really, really, really hurt my eyes all.
Eisel: During these few weeks, you have cried, yes, but we have cried together.
Like it’s just ridiculous to portray this as if only one of us is weeping.
And we have also laughed and we have laughed together and we have made love and we’ve made love together.
And I’ll just say again, the sex is still amazing.
It really is one of the reasons we’re still together.
We’ve had several days in which you had more than 100 orgasms in a day.
I think one day it was honestly closer to 200.
We didn’t go, it was over 150 one day.
It was crazy.
Melissa: Yeah, I mean, life and relationships are not primarily.
about sex, but it’s a huge, important part of our relationship that nobody has wanted to listen to, nobody’s wanted to pay attention to.
But yeah, of course, that’s a big part of it.
Eisel: There are two things people can’t relate to here.
One is the life of the mind, and the other is the life of the body.
They can’t relate to us as intellectuals, and they can’t relate to us sexually as sexual creatures, everyone say.
Melissa: Yeah, exactly.
And yeah, of course, the life of the mind is, yeah, your whole channel.
I mean, since the day you got on YouTube, you know, you’ve been Coming on the mic and talking about issues within religion.
Eisel: And making fun of myself and having a laugh at myself.
Again, we went through this tragedy together.
Basically, she got caught, whatever you want to say.
And she started to reveal and step by step started to be more honest with me about what had been lied to, the ways it had been misled and manipulated.
And again, yes, we yelled at each other.
Yes, there was some weeping involved, but there was also laughter and loving each other and, you know, I mean, And I was going to have a laugh at my expense.
I’ve done a lot of comedy stuff, even, I just say, there’s been a lot of joking around.
And if you regard, I mean, is that a sign of strength or is that a sign of weakness? Is that a sign that I’m insane or is it a sign of sanity? You know, I just say, well, go on, what are you going to say?
Melissa: So I was going to say one part of this video from Scare Theater mentioned that at the start of Eisel’s YouTube channel, he seemed more optimistic.
And I just want to say, you know, I feel really guilty, I feel really ashamed, and I feel really sorry that I have damaged that.
I am supposed to be the one who’s optimistic here, and I too want to be with Eisel when I’m 65 years old.
I really want him to be the person that...
Eisel: But after 65, she’s single.
Melissa: Yeah, no, it’s just I haven’t been able to be the partner that I should have been, be the person that I should have been, be an honest person, be open.
And that’s what I’m trying to explain here is that I was hiding things, I was lying to Eisel, I was lying to myself, I was lying to everybody.
And it’s all just come out in this very explosive series of revelations.
Eisel: So this guy did a lot of research on us before making the video, but another interesting moment is he shows a video of you from so long ago where you are basically talking about how wonderful your relationship is with me and how people in the audience don’t understand what’s positive about a relationship.
That they imagine I’m an abusive boyfriend, they imagine you’re trying to escape, and it’s not true.
You made this super positive video talking about all the wonderful aspects of relationship in contrast to these kind of conspiracy theories in the audience.
But what he doesn’t know, scare monger here, what he doesn’t know is you had already been cheating on me at that time.
Melissa: Right, exactly.
Eisel: So you made that video actually when you took a break from one of the guys you were cheating on me with.
So she, I don’t even want to count how many.
I’m just being real with you.
But one of the most important guys, you cheat him with one of the most intense relationship.
She isn’t just masturbating on camera and saying it to him.
She’s not just cheating in this sense.
She’s not just planning to meet up with him and have sex by my back and manipulating me lying to me.
She’s talking to this guy about getting married with him and having a baby with him.
She’s telling me the same thing as Sam.
Whoa, it’s really dark, Yeah, incredibly.
Melissa: And I never went back and looked at those messages, but I’m going back and looking at them now and I just feel so disgusted.
I feel like vomiting.
I can’t.
Eisel: Sometimes, but sometimes we’re laughing about it.
Sometimes, I mean, it’s the full range of emotions.
That’s also not what you, that’s not what you see on the Disney Channel either.
Sometimes we sit around and have a laugh about how ridiculous it is.
Melissa: Yes, and I’m just saying, you know.
Eisel: Even the thing about the open relationship, what could be more ridiculous? Like, you have an open relationship, you have polyamory, you could have sex with someone else, but you managed to cheat anyway.
Like, it is ridiculous.
We can’t laugh about how absurd it is.
Melissa: Yeah, and look, I agree with you about this is not CNN, this is not the Disney Channel.
This is real life and this is real evil.
This is real lies and deception on my part.
And I’m seeing the effect that it’s had on Eisel and I just, you know.
Eisel: So you see, he, I still recommend the video.
It’s a great video.
This video she made talking about how positive and wonderful our relationship is, how it’s helped her intellectually and helped her, all these great things.
But when she said that, She already was betraying me.
She already had done these things.
And she was at that very time, she was lying to me about manipulating me.
So when you know all the things I know now and you see that in that context, this is itself actually an example of her.
What are you going to say? Her gaslighting me, her manipulating me, really her abusing me.
So that’s a video where if you look at what’s on the surface, It doesn’t seem like she’s an abusive girlfriend to me at all.
And when you really understand what’s going on, you understand the seriousness of the abuse and what the effects are.
But look, guys, you know, okay, you’ve seen Melissa weeping.
How much better do you expect her to cope with this? How much stronger do you expect her to be? You know, you’ve seen me angry about it, I suppose, and you’ve seen me joking about it.
And again, we made a song together.
homemade a parody song and we made at least two comedy videos since then.
okay, how much stronger do you expect me to be?
Melissa: Sure, and I can criticize myself for just my performances, of course.
I can criticize myself for having done this in the 1st place, but I also can criticize myself for how I’m presenting this because I do have a responsibility and I just, yeah, I’m A 31-year-old woman.
I should be able to just, accept what I’ve done.
And it’s just, yeah, still, it still is very, very difficult, even though I’m the one that did it.
You know, and Eisel’s the one that is coping with this.
You know, I knew what I’d done.
But Eisel did not.
This is all new to him.
Just within the last few weeks.
Eisel: She had four years to prepare for this because she was lying to me about it and manipulating me for four years.
I didn’t have 4 minutes.
I find out I’m devastated and heartbroken. Yeah. Right.
Melissa: And yeah, it’s not just that, you know, Eisel has spent a lot of time talking with me about this.
You know, it’s both, you know, discussions about moving forward, what we do, but it’s also how to cope with some of these problems that I have.
Eisel does really want to help me, and I want to help him.
I want to do something to bring back that optimism to make his life better.
Eisel: But it’s very hard at this moment to see what that is.
Melissa: It’s very hard to see that.
Eisel: Yeah.
Melissa: Look, and how do you expect Eisel to cope with it? a lot of people are looking at how he behaves in the videos, but this was a new revelation and this is a new...
Eisel: Totally shocking.
Melissa: Yeah, not just the betrayal,
Eisel: but how much more calm and collected and attached did you say maybe?
Melissa: Other things about the woman that he’s been living with for seven years, who he thought that I was, who he thought that I had been, and then realizing.
Eisel: And being very silly promises you made that have been broken.
Melissa: Right.
Eisel: Like this is literally you sneaking around behind my back to do things.
Melissa: Yeah, sneaking away.
Eisel: Well, listen, just to give a quick example, she lies to me and tells me she’s going to the gym, and she’s not going to the gym.
She’s going to cheat on me with this gun.
Whoa.
So, and then you look back, all kinds of things.
It’s, again, what do you, how much less agony do you expect from me?
Melissa: Right, but I know one of the overriding things is like, why are you sharing this at all?
Eisel: Right.
Melissa: But yeah, getting back to the start of your video, you know, this is not a Disney Channel movie, you know, and Yeah, you’ve made a commitment, to be honest.
And before you were ever on YouTube, people made up stories about your sex life.
People made up stories about you being a bad guy.
And you’ve had to cope with that your whole life.
So that’s what it is.
Eisel: You know, I’ll say this also, like, what does it mean to be a dissident intellectual? What is the life of a dissident intellectual when you’re in a society where, you know, The vast majority of the population just wants to pretend that all the things I’m passionate about don’t matter and don’t exist.
Melissa: That’s why I fell in love with you.
Yeah, that’s right.
That’s why, yeah, I loved your channel.
That’s you.
Before I met you, were the most intellectual YouTube channel, the most intellectual author that I’d known.
Just, it was incredible reading what you had written.
Eisel: Right.
Melissa: You know, I’d.
Eisel: Wait, so sorry, did we just mention the passing? So I’ve written and published two books.
And, you know, I had, up until two weeks ago, I regard it as a really happy, cherished memory that she had read the books with me as I was writing them chapter by chapter.
She read each chapter and then we had long walks in the park and she told me what she thought of the chapter.
Woo! Now I’ve seen the messages between her and one of the other guys she was cheating on me with.
Now I know what was going on at exactly that time, the extent to which I was being lied to and manipulated while I was writing this book and I was being cheated on, I was being betrayed, I was being backstabbed.
So now my memory of researching and writing that book, it’s forever changed in retrospect.
It’s a huge, heartbreaking crisis for me.
But again, I have the strength.
You guys, if you’ve never seen another video here, you have a sense of a relationship just from this conversation.
You have a sense of the real strength I bring to this.
I can share my life this way.
So I want to wrap it up.
I want to say, if you want to, do you want to add anything before I wrap it up?
Melissa: No, I want to hear what you have to say.
Eisel: If you go through this life with the assumption that anything an average person wouldn’t do should not be done, anything a normal person wouldn’t do should not be done, you are signing up for a life of cowardice.
Because the average person is a coward.
What you mean by normal actually means weak and timid and fearful, right? You know, If you lack the courage to do what Melissa has done and what I have done, do not diagnose us as having a psychiatric disorder.
Do not try to force us into a mental hospital because we refuse to lie about our lives and misrepresent what we’re going through as if we’re on the Disney Channel or as if we’re just typical Instagram lifestyle influencers.
The main thing people have said to me personally is be strong.
You know, stay strong.
I want to ask you to examine your own lives.
What does it mean to be strong? Does it mean concealment? Does it mean hiding? You know, or does strength equate to, you know, being able to endure openly? even the mockery and criticism of another YouTube channel that has 1 million subscribers.
if you’re telling someone to be strong, you’re not telling them to hide.
You’re not telling them to live a lie.
You’re not telling them to wear a mask.
You’re not telling them to keep up a false public perception of who you are, okay? I have the strength not to retreat behind fictions, not to retreat behind beliefs, not to retreat behind lies.
And one of the purposes of my channel is to reach out to you and say, how about you? How about you live a more authentic life like me too? How about you get serious? about the life of the mind.
How about you get serious about changing the world as a distant intellectual in the way that you can? I had university professors.
I had university professors and I looked at them and thought, I don’t want to end up like you.
And, you know, I chose to live my life openly and honestly in a way that is incompatible with a respectable profession, like being a university professor.
But if you have watched this whole video, I think you will already get the sense there is still something here for you to respect, and there’s something really important for you to learn from, even if you are just learning from our mistakes.